Let me tell you about the adventures of Kris and Betsy
as they try to repair a little, inexpensive auction score,
in what they thought would be a walk in the park,
and take almost no time at all!!!!!
Remember her little table that stands between the twin beds in her guest room that we are working on and having a really good time doing all this cool stuff and decorating and playing together and writing run on sentences??????
The stone on the top of the table was broken.
We knew this when we bid on the table.
We figured.....
how hard could it be to replace the top with a 12" X 12" piece of stone?????
We figured....
easy peasy!!!!!
We figured.....
walk in the park!!!!!
We figured.....

The table had really nice lines.
It was delicate and girly and was going to look great in my Kris's guest room.
 The top was onyx.
A beautiful and expensive stone.
But we figured.....
silly girls that we are....
that we only needed a 12X12 piece, so.....
 I pulled the frame off the stone by pulling out the little brads on the sides that held it in place.
They were nailed to the wood subfloor that was under the stone,
Last week,
we had a little time on Friday afternoon, and thought this would be a fun errand to tackle together,
spend some quality buddy time on an absolutely sweltering July day.
Much more fun than going to a swimming hole.
DIYers are sick, sick. sick, I tell ya
first we went to United Marble, in Watertown.
They are fabricators, and I've been doing business with them for over 30 years.
I thought that they might have a small piece of marble left over from a larger job that we could buy, and have them cut to fit.
I hadn't been there in a while,
seeing as I'm retired,
but I remembered exactly where it was!!!!!
Boy was I confused when we drove down the ally, and nothing was there.
Kris is giving me sideways glances.....
trying to be nice.....
but I could tell she thought I had just started the slippery slope to loosing my tiny brain box.
this excursion was a bust at this point....
But I am not one to give up!
Next we went to the retail store that was associated with the stone fabricator.
It was just around a mile away.
We lucked out and found a parking spot on the street,
and trooped into the store, lugging the table with us,
hope in our hearts and smiles on our faces.
The business was under new ownership.....
Just recently bought by some very nice guys.....
but they did't have what we wanted.
The young gentleman behind the counter knew where United Marble was!!!!!
And he gave us directions!!!!!
So, back we drove.
I had remembered it being down an ally off of Arlington Street in Watertown.
He directed us to a parallel road, one block over.
Sure enough, it was down the alley on the left, looking just the same as in my old memories.
I couda sworn....
the mind is a strange and mysterious place. 
Kris and I go trouping in,
lugging the table,
happy to have finally found the business.
We met a very nice young woman name Kristen.
Kris, my buddy, thought her name was beeoutiful, since that be her real name toooooo.
We showed young Kristen the table we were trying to fix and a piece of the broken stone so she could see how thick we wanted the replacement to be.
she informed us that they only carried 3/4" or thicker slabs.
Our piece was a quarter of an inch thick.
This was not working out.
At all.
She told us to go back to the place we had just come from, or any other stone and tile retail store in the area,and see if they had a stone tile that we could then bring back to her, and she would cut if to fit for us.

Before we left, 
I turned at the door,
and laughing told her about my first attempt to drive to their business,
only to end up down a dead end ally.
Where upon she comments!!!!!
"Boy...you've been doing business with us for a
(Yeah, I got the memo, I'm older now.....jeesh)
They used to be over where Kris and I first looked.
The building they moved into is the exact same layout and style as their old one.
They must have been built by the same guy, and the same time.
I thought I had lost it.
Turns out I be Hay O Kay!!!!!

now that I was no longer freaking out about developing early onset dementia,
we resumed our quest.
There were several tile and stone places along Arsenal Street in Watertown that we could check out.
We went into the first one we passed,
hauling the table with us.
I had never been to this store before.
The woman behind the counter was snooty.
I told here we wanted to buy a 12 X 12 piece of onyx tile.
She looked me up and down....
from my paint spattered t-shirt to my baggy jean shorts and informed me that it would be a special order and that we would need to purchase 10 sq. feet.
Which would be over 200 bucks.
We only paid 60 for this little table, and weren't about to blow that on the top.
I don't like to give money to stuck up bitches.
I mean.....
The hag works in a tile store for Pete's sake.
Can't she just tell who I am?????: the wonderful troll who lives down in a basement creating fabulous treasures with paint?????
Needless to say....
Kris and I took our high class @$$es out of there and moved on to the next business establishment that peddles stone and tile.
Now, this place I knew.
Tile Showcase.
I've been using them since.....
That's right campers.
That long!!!!!
Kris and I grab the table and go into their overstock warehouse section and talk to a very nice young man who faked being was pleased for our large order!!!!
We showed him our table, and he told us to look around for something we liked.
We could buy just one tile of something if we wanted too.
I started poking around through boxes and boxes of stone tile.
Talking the poor guys head off.....
when Kris comes nonchalantly walking up and says....
"What about  this?????"
She had found a wonderful piece of porcelain tile that looked so much like stone that I thought it was.
We had been looking for a warm tone stone to work with the colors of Kris's guest room.
This tile was absolutely perfect.
It was 16 dollars.
Much better than 200 and something.
Kris whipped out her wallet and paid with cash!!!!!
Then we hopped back in her trusty Honda and sped back to United Tile.
They were happy to see us because this was going to be a big job for them, and there was a lot of profit involved.
They charged a whopping $5.00 to cut it for us and it was ready yesterday for pickup.
Kris ran over to get it and brought the tile with the table to my house so I could put it together for her.
And here it is.....
Ta Daaaa!!!!!
I think it looks pretty damn good.
Her 20 something daughter (whose room this used to be) wont hurt it when she leaves drink glasses or coffee cups on it when she's visiting.
Porcelain tile can really stand up to a lot of abuse.
So, here's a before and after.
I think it looks like an old piece of stone.
That might just be because I'm an old piece of something.....
Not sure.....

On that note,
Latah, Gatah


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